Why am I dating you? Is that really a question that needs to be asked?
Because you are a beautiful person who somehow sees the best in me
Because you don’t ever judge me for who I am or what I do
Because when I’m with you I feel safe and loved and at home
Because when we kiss I feel fireworks
And when you hold me it feels like everything is going to be okay
Because you’re awkward and weird and strange like me
Because we have similar music tastes and sing together
Because you’re a nerd that plays video games and watches some of my shows and is down to watch more with me
Because you make me write dumb poems and you’re the subject of some of my art pieces
Because even when I’m in this state where I don’t want to be around people or talk to anyone I still want to be by your side
Because even though I’m damaged and broken and so scared of being hurt again you still want to be with me
Because ever since I first saw you I knew that I wanted you and I never want to let go
Because I’ve fallen in love with you (via you-make-me-go-buh)
Today doesnt feel happy without you. Like every goddamn day. I miss you but its depressing so im avoiding. Im good at that at least.. But im forever loving you. I figured it might disappear yet im still here. So all the songs have become about you and the more i try to escape the more you seep in and i guess im just accepting that nobody will ever replace you and my heart feels that warmness when i think about you. Nobody could hurt me as much as you because i have never loved someone like you. It took this relationship for me to realize what real love looks like. I never thought the songs were true or how someone could find a soulmate and now all i wonder is how many times in other realms we found each other. Why we are apart has more meaning and i know im going to spoil you with more love than youve ever had. I cant tell you how i feel around you. Nervous.. Excited.. Idk. Mad? I feel crazy. Crazier i guess. I love you. Thats all i can manage to get out and its pathetic how poetic i am otherwise. After im finished gathering my poetry i might get the nerve to send it all to you. But it might be an embarassing amount. Like a huge ass box. Then youll stop thinking im so cheesy with just the i love yous. Youll move on to thinking im crazier than you think. Obsessive. Loving from a distance. For once im writing about someone romantically. A thug needs love too? I didnt think id fall for real. Usually im just poetic out of duty but with you it just spills out. Its rawness and its not about sounding cute its real and thats scary as shit. The brain says no and the hearts like fuck you. Ive yet to follow the heart since i walked out and we’re past pride now im waiting on time. And ill spend the rest of my life trying to prove how much i care about you. Even when im an asshole please know youre the only thing keeping me grounded to reality. I camt believe youre still with me after everything i out you through. Sure you did some shit but i know im the real problem and youre just giving me a taste of my own medicine. The medicine woman isnt supposed to need you.. My only remedy. Ugh. Fuck you i love you. Im sorry. I need to come home but i know im not ready. Itll cause more harm and im running out of excuses to get well for both of our sake. To stop living in the past hurt. It took 3 years to get over you displeasing me but you knew it was going to take that long. Because you know damn well how much i love and loved you. Im missing you a lot today. Every day. Wow this was longer than i planned. This post and my love. I hope you dont get tired of waiting for me to act like a normal human being bc thats never happening. I love you more than weed. Myself.. Etc. I wish you were with me today and i wish we never separated but we really never did huh? Baby im never leaving turned out to be a huge lie but honestly i never really left my hearts always belonged to you. Youre right i live in the past bc thats always how im going to feel. I totally get how old people stay in love its bc they remember when they first met. Ill never forget or feel differently than when we first laid eyes on each other. Its like i found my purpose. I found something i didnt know i was missing. Then i had to go without to realize i am addicted. Of all the things and habits to break youre the thing i cant live without and have no desire to. I get all the suicidal shit. Usually im sad for no reason. How refreshing to find something or in this case someone that makes me feel that way. That sounds emo af but its true. Anyways i guess i love you but you know that already. Youre just waiting for me to actually show it. Which is hard for me. And for you. Because we are so awkward but also aggressive and terrified of being hurt again. How we found the same personality differently is a miracle. Dont tell me we arent perfect bc you made me believe in a real soulmate. This is getting dramatic but idk how else to behave with you bc you make me so fucking expressive it baffles me. I could ramble on forever about you. I think youre crazy for still talking to me but im in hxc denial that you share the same feelings as me. Like this is a sick joke. Im glad we met and ill be gladder when we’re finally together. One wayyy or anotherrr im gonna find youuu. Maybe come to your house unexpectedly as i please. I need to see you sometimes even though i know the result isnt good. Because im addicted and even a second is enough sometimes. I wish i would have kissed you longer. I miss you baby.